fatherhood

FATHER-HOOD AT 20...

By C Banda

As l sit on this wooden desk, l feel the burden on my shoulders. Does life really have to be this hard? Dad its been 12 years since you left and filling your shoes has been impossible. No it hasn't but dad being a father
at 20 is so difficult.

Sam's dad had passed on 12 years ago and Sam was left to look after his 2 siblings and his mum. Sorry to interrupt you Sam, you may continue...

''Like l was saying, its been hard. Every night when l wake up to study, l hear mum cry and every drop of her tears makes my heart break. l am trying to be strong, to balance school and fatherhood. l have a small business l have started to try and feed the family and pay my fees as mum is now jobless. Today l managed to buy my little sister her new winter uniform.
She hasn't taken it off since then. My heart rejoices!

I just wish l was like all the normal 20 year old's. I wish l could hang out with my friends and get to chill too. But l rise with the sun, and as l try to sleep, the sun rises again. I have matured before my age, l am now failing to fit in with my peers. Being a father is so tough. My advise to my peers is to cherish the life that they have and love their parents. For
me, its maturity, maturity and maturity.

maturity

 "Mature, if you still can."

By C. Banda

Your age does not define you, you define your age. The crazy thing is the older I get the more I see what they told me is true. If we would listen to our parents, life wouldn't be as bad. I'm grown isn't an excuse for
ignorance. Age doesn't define maturity. When we humans reach a certain age, that's when we realize what's important in
our lives. Sometimes problems don't require a solution to solve them; instead they require maturity to outgrow them. Some people think maturity is to do with age. In fact mature people are those who have learned from
their mistakes, have a better vision in life and understanding. Some people are like trees, they take forever to grow up. Just because I'm young, doesn't mean I don't know anything about life, I've been through too much not to know, but I'm still learning everyday its ups and downs. I always tell my best friend Roy that I will treat my next woman better than my
last. Not because she's different, but because I am. I have learned a lot since my last relationship and each day I continue to learn and open my mind to the many ways to love your woman the right way. One's age does not guarantee emotional and
spiritual maturity and stability.
Openness of heart and mind do. Sometimes you gotta shut up, swallow your pride and accept that you're wrong.
Its not giving up. Its called growing up. Being nice to someone who did you foul in the past is kinda like a mature way of
getting revenge because it sometimes confuses the hell out of them and brings them to the realization that they no longer can manipulate your emotions with their actions...something they thought they'd always be able to do. Maturity is when your world opens up and you realize that you are not the center of it. Being nice to someone you dislike doesn't mean you're FAKE. It means you are mature enough to tolerate your dislike towards them. Some people
mature too fast, some too slow. Some never had a childhood, some never grow. Age is just a number, I repeat. Maturity is a choice. Forgive and forget, and don't hold grudges, because those who hold grudges are
immature, those who never forgive are weak, and those who accept things the way they are, are growing. In conclusion, know that there's more to life then getting laid and partying. Don't think I'm weird, I just grew up and matured. There's still time for you to do the same.